I took myself to the doctor this am because my sore throat was going on a little too long without turning into a cold. I sat in the exam room where I could overhear all the PAs call patients to say "Ma'am, it's Dr. So and So, your throat culture came back negative." (One was actually talking about how menopause was kicking her a*s, and the other mentioned being set up with a 41 year old Jewish businessman, but I digress). Point is, the PA seeing me said there were five people in before me with sore throats, all negative. I asked if it was a virus, prepared to be sent home with a prescription for "stop partying". However, not to be outdone, the HMOH got a positive strep culture (who's an overachiever - this girl!) and am now on a regimen of antibiotics for the next ten days. I didn't even get the pink bubble gum stuff I faked being sick for as a child. Awesome.
Summer -1, HMOH - 0.
I'll take the time before I pass out from pain and exhaustion to comment on a recent Marie Claire article shared with me about a new "trend" in wedding outfitting. I'm going to go ahead and use the word trend extremely lightly because I have to believe that while people are getting married later in life - it's not typical that you get married at an age when you're already depending on Depends. That's right folks - the bridal diaper.
We all know that the dress is one of the biggest decisions for the day (for some, more so than the guy you marry). Brides can go all puffy, princessy-y, big skirt crazy - to each is own. Apparently bridal stores sell these little absorbent gems (bridal diapers) alongside veils, hairpieces and garter belts. I question that if your dress is too cumbersome to be maneuvered with at least two of your bridesmaids, that you might want to reconsider your choice. Listen, I'm going to be perfectly honest in saying I understand where the idea for this was born and why a manufacturer would get behind it. Simple laws of supply and demand. As a MOH I have reached down under the bride's big puffy dress and helped her to wipe herself (don't you judge, I'm a good friend). I've escorted brides to the bathroom mid-party to hold up the mountains of tulle and help her to squat over the toilet. It's no easy task - but is dancing the night away and cutting the cake going to be all that enjoyable if you've peed yourself (or dare I say, worse???). I'll stand behind practical inventions, I'll stand behind Spanx. I'll stand behind the fact that your now husband is going to have to get over the fact that, in order to consummate the marriage, he's going to have peel back layers of brassieres, chicken cutlet boob enhancers, girdles, etc. I'm not sure he's going to want to change your diaper. Hey, I could be wrong.
So there you have my thoughts on this bridal wee wee wonder. I learn something new every day - and thank you Danielle for passing it along. Feel free to throw this post back in my face when I'm engaged at 81, married for the first time at 82 and my bridal diaper is all the rage. I at least hope they make them with lacy plastic tabs.
To a good weekend and these antibiotics getting the job done. Leave your comments, thoughts, etc. below!
-HMOH
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