he said, she said #701: do you check the finger so as not to get the finger?

Happy July!  How we got to July, I'm not sure - but the long weekend is always welcome.  HMOH and "27 Tuxedos" have teamed up for their first "he said, she said."  He'll give his take, she'll give hers (and always think she's right).  


As a woman you will never know if a man's engaged.  He doesn't wear a scarlet letter saying he's taken a year before the nuptials (on the plus, girl's save three months' worth of paychecks).  But I know we take note of a wedding band first and foremost.  So I asked "27 Tuxedos" the question.  As a single guy, do you immediately check out a girl's hand before putting out the mojo all night? Seems it'd save you some time. Since daddy-macking it usually isn't a sure bet (in most respectable instances anyways), why not set your sights on someone without a sparkling finger?  

He said: You would think that a guy who’s been single for the better part of the last decade would be pretty savvy about checking out the hand.  For some reason though, this always seems to slip my mind (blame it on the alcohol).  Fortunately for the unattached, the big rock dangling off of her little finger is usually pretty noticeable.  So I can tell if you're engaged - but if it's not sitting next to the rock, spotting a wedding ring is a much more covert operation.  They trend smaller and are more easily confused with you know, an everyday piece of jewelry. 

I hate to say it (I like to believe I’m in my high school prime still), but I’ve clearly hit the age when I need to constantly be on the lookout for the dreaded ring.  The good news is that as I continue to get older, the crowd at the bars/lounges I frequent gets younger.  A higher percentage of younger girls should equate to a lower likelihood that the girl I’m creeping on is married or engaged. 

Having said all that, this exercise made me realize that it’s definitely time for me to get my ring-dar in check, and get better at honing in on the bling before I approach a new lady of intrigue.   There’s no worse feeling in the world than spending hours talking to a girl, "building a connection", and getting excited about what is about to happen ... only to have her drop the bomb on you that she’s in a relationship, or better yet a Mrs.  Before losing too much precious time, taking some bruises to the ego, and regretting any poor decision-making, check the left hand my friends.

She said: At the beach recently, in the midst of sweaty beach bars, shots of Soco and lime and creepers, a man approached my best friend, my married best friend.  She was just carrying on a conversation - he was putting on the moves.  She was just sitting there with a rock on her finger and he was figuring out when the best time to bring up "let's get out of here."  She was thinking in just two more hours it'd be great to get pizza, call her husband (who was at a bachelor party and strip club), and then get to bed at a decent hour of 5:00 a.m.  He was thinking - "if I put a sock on the door will my roommate be cool enough to sleep on the couch tonight?" She was ok with the attention - hey, you have to prove you've still got it.  


Later in the evening he got a little too close; she turned her head and put up her hand with the ring. Still, after turning his attention elsewhere for an hour or two, he'd keep popping back in to see if she was still married, or at least more intoxicated.  Onlookers (mainly our friends) were a little nervous that she'd be tempted to make bad decisions; I was confident that unless this guy had mozzarella cheese and sauce in his pocket, he didn't really stand a chance.

-HMOH and "27 Tuxedos"