HMOH #30before30: trace your roots in ellis island

You hear it time and time again, prob cause it's true - you're the worst tourist in your own city.  I've never climbed the Statue of Liberty and I'd never made my way to explore the roots of immigration at Ellis Island.  Being a first generation American, I long thought that my parents were filthy poor and did jigs in the steerage of a boat on their way to America.  I pictured them showing up at the gates of Ellis Island, getting their head checked for fleas and their throats scraped for unknown reasons.  It was very Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic and dramatic, just the way I liked it.


Turns out Mom caught an American Airlines flight over (they served peanuts and beverages) and Dad + family took a luxury cruiseliner.  Part vacation, part let's migrate to our new land of opportunity.  Shattered my history lesson, but I was still excited to cross "visit Ellis Island" off my "30 before 30" list recently. 


In town for a weekend or a jaded New Yorker (if Mary Poppins come to mind here, you are a jaded New Yorker) look up the ferry schedule and see what those who came before you endured to set your roots here!

Visiting Ellis Island
Book your reservations in advance so you can pop on the "Reserved" line with less of a wait.  Expect airport-like security and to be yelled at when you're talking on your phone (done).  Also expect that the security guy will creep on you and say he didn't want to have to restain you (done again).  Pack snacks ... it's what the immigrants would have wanted you to do.  And don't worry, they serve hotdogs on the boat.


 Take the ferry and enjoy the sites.  Lady Liberty is way more impressive up close than from the city skyline.  The ferry ticket allows you to stop both at the Statue (currently closed for renovations) and Ellis Island before heading back to the South Street Seaport.  Deck hands are creepy too.

Once you've arrived, opt for the audio tour (included in your day pass) and prepare to walk around and learn about the way it once was.  The tour takes you through your journey as if you too were just arriving in America - and about an hour.

At the end of your journey you arrive at the spot where families were reunited and loved ones claimed their passengers.  You're also greated by the line to pay to access your family history from the extensive database. I saved my research until I got to Ellis Island thinking it'd feel more authentic if I looked up my family members in the very spot they embarked on their new life in America. They'll charge you $12 to use their commuters, and $5 a photo to print ... OR you can access it for free by registering here. #touristtrap

Here's the passenger ship that my great grandfather came to Ellis Island on.  He made the voyage at just 23 to meet his uncle and see about a better life.  I bet he did a few jigs down in the steerage.  Had to.  Returning back to Sicily, he instead moved the family (my grandmother and my grandfather (then just a family friend)) to Tunisia.  My dad was born there ... and so our history begins.

Miss the ferry? No worries, it comes every 20 minutes and gives you time to take more tourist photos with your friends. 

And to top it off ...  Pearl Street is one of the oldest parts of New York City, located just by Battery Park where you'll be dropped off.  The little alley is lined with bars and restaurants, and my favorite part - outdoor wooden tables and benches.  In the mood for a raw bar, Ulysses Folk House offered us just what we wanted to cap off a great NYC day.  The four glasses of wine and chocolate covered strawberries that followed at Azra weren't too bad either.  Let's just say I did a jig home too.  Hey, my ancestors immigrated from Italy.  They wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

-HMOH

HMOH #30before30: get honky tonk in nashville

I've said it a million times and for those who have questioned it ... you should know better.  I'm like awesome at to-do lists, and more importantly, checking shit off.  So I've been motivated with a few great changes in my life to get to work on what's left remaining on this list.  I've also realized that there's not much time left to accomplish these small, silly, big and real achievements.

Up next was number 30 - get honky tonk in nashville.  It was one of those places I've always wanted to visit ... and there was no better time than CMA Festival to head down.  In celebration of our big promotions and new jobs, Ashley and I hit up Pepsi's corporate sponsor status and got great seats to a weekend long festival of country music and girls who don't know how to dress well.  All I had to do was get down there ...

And so all hail, god bless US Airways.  They never seize to amaze me with their poorly planned connections, awful staff and bad luck to all traveling plans.  With an expected arrival at 6:45 pm (it's too early in the game to be asking for vacation at the new job), I was going to get quickly to the hotel, change into my NY version of down south garb, and head to the concert that had the likes of Carrie Underwood as a headliner.  US Airways and ATC (air traffic control, we're on an acronym basis now) had different plans.  Long story short so as not to relive  ... I missed my connection, got rerouted twice, called my mommy and cried like a not thirty year old ... and arrived in Nashville after two more connecting flights at 11 p.m. where I instead I went straight to the bars.

Ashley and her coworker met me on the corner, but not before Ash stocked the hotel room with Firefly sweet tea, snacks and post-it notes to put me in a better mood.  Yes, my friends travel with post-it notes and I love them for it.

Bummed to miss the night's concert - we made up for it at Legends Corner bar with an awesome cover band.  I pretended to know the words to most songs, jived along and sipped on sweet tea to catch right up.  And so I did ...

The rest of the trip went smoothly - I woke up each morning with "Rock Me Mama Like a Wagon Wheel" in my head.  Saturday we strolled through town in the heat and stopped for a mid-morning Corona to cool down, made our way to the famous Grand Ole Opry concert hall and the Gaylord Opry Hotel (which b t dubs has a full on river running through it).  The Southern boys were cute as could be and surprisingly (pleasantly) there weren't any of the size 00 blondes I expected to see running the joint. The evening's concert was amah-zing due in part to Luke Bryan and the fact that we smuggled Grey Goose minis in my purse and hid them under a tampon so anyone checking wouldn't dare more it aside.  Fireworks closed out the night and brought little girl joy to my heart.  A quick trip, but a great trip ... I'd love to find myself down there again with more time to honky tonk.

Check out the photobook below and my HMOH nashville recos should you too be looking to cross Music City off your list:

Legend's Corner Bar

Printer's Alley:  home to nude karaoke and gentleman's clubs

naturals

Grand Ole Opry

Gaylord Opry Resort

#CMAfest

LP Field for Luke Bryan

my fave: fireworks after the show

  

Stay at:  Marriot Courtyard Downtown.  With only 2 weeks to book over a festival weekend, and limited options the Marriot was clean, walking distance from the scene and super accommodating.

Eat at: Whiskey Kitchen - and get the jalapeno calamari with frickles (fried pickles); 417 Union for a classic American meal; Paradise Park for 3am fried chicken, double decker burgers and I think those were chili fries

NOTE: With limited time in n-ville and no car to get places, we weren't able to visit all the reco'd foodie spots (for next time!).  Here are some others that come highly recommended:  Pancake Pantry, Loveless Cafe for southern food and Patterson House for cocktails.

Get your [tourist] honky tonk on at: Legends, CMA Festival, Wildhorse Saloon (try three floors, three different bands and a great crowd)

Check your tourist stops off at:  Grand Ole Opry house, Gaylord Opry Resort, Vanderbilt University's campus

Songs to download, even if you swear you'd never like it (trust me, this NYC chick did too ... give it a chance): 

• Drunk On You (Luke Bryan)
• Country Girl Shake It for Me (Luke Bryan)
• Smoke a Little Smoke (Eric Church)
• Springsteen (Eric Church)
• Rock Me Mama Like a Wagon Wheel (Bob Dylan)
• Dirt Road Anthem (Jason Aldean)
• We Owned The Night (Lady Antebellum)
• Toes (Zac Brown Band)

-HMOH

4 days, 3 nights, 2 bachelorettes ...

• How come every time you have no where to go and all the evening at your fingertips to enjoy your mani/pedi, the lady rushes you out the door? and how come when you're in a rush and need to say - get back to the office - she takes her sweet ass time, perfectly crafts each nail and gives you the best massage ever? 
• and how come before you can leave on any kind of "for pleasure" vacation, you have to endure the worst work week(s) of your life?
• and ice cream isn't carbs, right?
• and how come - if it hadn't been done a million times before - the trip you planned months ago will inevitably end up a great screenplay for some bachelor/ette themed movie?

These were a few thoughts (besides "how do I quit and still get paid" and "hand me a margarita") I pondered before jetting out to this past week's Puerto Rico bachelorette bash. Before I get started, let me say hello to Jason, Danielle's fiancée.  Rest assured, we were all well-behaved.


The theme: "4 days, 3 nights, 2 bachelorettes, 1 hell of a good time" (I'm cheesy, deal).  The backstory: sorority sisters who met in college - Danielle and Ari are bridesmaids in each other's weddings (1 month apart) and it was time to combine bridal party forces and take ourselves to the Caribbean.  Eight girls headed down to get their bachelorette party on.


And while we all came back with our teeth, their fiancées and most of our dignity, what did happen was something only an HMOH bachelorette party could bring:

• Try arriving at the airport to find your 6:45 am flight had been cancelled, then watching as one f'ing American Airlines agent pretended she was about to rebook and help the 100 people who'd gathered in line,
• Frantically dialing your friend who was supposed to pick you up in a cab for the airport but clearly overslept .. and missed the flight (no worries, she' d manage to get down later),
• Sitting besides a 300 lb snoring man and an old lady with no eyebrows who smelled like she rolled around in Downy after smoking her fifth pack of the day,
• Arriving in the hotel lobby after a crazy ass morning only to be greeted by 1) rain and 2) the bachelorette's ex-boyfriend and his current girlfriend  ...  who of course planned a romantic getaway on the same weekend,
• Torrential downpours each day from noon through the evening (apparently Puerto Rico has a rainy season ... and tanning salons, just saying),
• A "bed bug" incident which in turn led to an exterminator, two "very full" mosquitoes and a room switch,
• A taxi driver who played his YouTube music videos (and sounded like he'd be castrated) to the back seat and swore on his life he plays often at Madison Square Garden … you know, and drives a Puerto Rican taxi for fun on weekends,
• Saki bombs, Puerto Rican style,
• Waking up in your hotel room to the sound of a pigeon cooing in your ear (I'm still 65% certain it happened in real life),
• A bachelorette leaving the dinner table to puke because she was too hungover to eat her $60 filet mignon,
• Finding out we were taken off the return flight because of our "no show" on the cancelled leg from Friday,

... and the kicker, after sorting it all out ... 

• Arriving safely in New York and being asked to sit back down after gathering luggage from our overhead bins (carefully, as some items may have shifted).  Then watching as four officers walked to the exit row, instructed a man and his girlfriend to grab their carry-on (they almost took a friend's before we insisted it wasn't theirs), and then following outside where he was handcuffed and she was interrogated.  Yep, we walked to baggage claim with the criminal and his police escorts, full on CSI-style.

With sun each morning from 8am to noon, a tan, a Facebook friend request from one Pedro Juan, etc. and endless dirty martinis (extra dirty) ... a good time had by all. 

So, if you're planning to host a Bachelorette party in the area, steer clear of two things: May and American Airlines.  That said, here are some HMOH recommendations (note: due to weather, we did not really leave the vicinity):

1. Stay at: El San Juan or La Concha
2. Eat at:  La Concha's Perla Restaurant
3. Party at:  Brava (Saturday night, you'll need your high school ID for Friday)
4. Best place for makeshift pickle back shots (read: Jameson + pickle juice):  Brother Jimmy's @ ESJ
5. Best place for extra dirty martinis:  Anywhere old married men are seated and will buy them for you
6. Best thing to do when it rains all day:  See 4 and 5
7. Best way to entertain yourselves:  Watch this clip and have your less than sober friends reenact it ALL. DAY. LONG.

-HMOH

NAT GEO WILD: penn state vs. alabama

If I don't see an airport or plane for the remainder of the year, I'd be ok with that. At least for now.  I'm without a voice and a little under the weather given my recent trip to the South.  It's been one of those days when I've questioned if I'm getting too old for this.  LIE. For starters, the plane to Birmingham on Thursday evening seated about 50 passengers - of which 40 were dressed in blue and white. There was an initial attempt at a "WE ARE" chant when we were told to put our tray tables in the upright position - and not surprising, the flight attendant informed the group we were out of alcohol with about an hour left to go.  If Penn State was headed down for the football massacre, they weren't about to do it sober.

With five of us in town for the weekend, we got the private tour of Birmingham from Alabama native (and our gracious host) Jennie.  Her five bedroom + sun room home is incredible with floor to ceiling doors, winding stairs and perfectly decorated with antiques (and a rent less than my studio apartment; JEALOUS).  There were burlap sacks with our initials waiting in the foyer upon arrival with "Welcome down South" items: Sweet Tea, Edgar's Bakery lemon squares, Southern Lady magazine, pickle-flavored chips (my favorite) and napkins that read:  "What happens tonight ... goes on Facebook tomorrow."  Needless to say, the local tour didn't disappoint. 

We did some Friday morning shopping, picked up $140 worth of alcohol for Saturday and visited Saw's BBQ (the wait-staff was less than appreciative of us being PSU fans).  I did my best at an attempt to eat BBQ with the chicken+broccoli tater. At night we saw a great view of the city from The Club (pronounced: THEE Club), were treated to free appetizers (a second dinner) at Bottega, hit up a local watering hole and then made our way home for a pickle chips and cheddar Whales party.  We soon passed out to prepare for an early morning start time.

After an impressive breakfast of cheese grits, bacon, biscuits and potato casserole - we chugged bloody marys, rushed out the door, realized we forgot the cooler with all our alcohol, drove back home to retrieve (PRIORITIES), and showed up panicked to catch the bus from B'ham to Tuscaloosa. Our ride to the game in a police-escorted bus with Penn State's President was most impressive.  The folks waiting on us (we were the last a'holes to arrive) were probably less than impressed. Alabama fans and cars decked in Crimson flags pulled to the side of the interstate as 30 of the Birmingham Alumni Association's older, more mature members (and six not-so-recent-grads) rode into town.

After a long day of football, trip to the stadium, and 45-minute ride turned 4-hour trip back home (let's just say Jennie's dad will never forget me) we returned to Jennie's with an SEC football game under our belts.  We ended this past weekend on Sunday with a "breakfast" of real Southern fare (perfect for a hangover since you got to choose what sides you wanted) and rode back to NYC with a bunch of tired and disgruntled Penn State fans who weren't about to request any alcohol on the flight home.

I'm all mac-n-cheesed out, could do for a solid 15 hour nap tonight and have been saying "y'all" quite a bit.  And fine, we lost. I know - but although the Tide is the apparent winner with a 24-3 final score, here is a look at the additional match-ups for the Lions vs. the Tide from this past weekend ...  I unofficially declare Penn State the winner. 

PENN STATE VS. ALABAMA

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 11

FOOTBALL

Winner: Alabama

We knew it was going to happen - let's be serious, we got spanked.  But even a caller into the local ESPN radio station was impressed by the number of fans that showed up to have a good time, admitting defeat prior to play.  We were in the bible belt, but it was going to take more than a Christmas miracle this year to beat the #1 team.

HOSPITALITY

Winner: Alabama

In my years at Penn State - when we were far from a consistently winning team - I saw less than nice PSU fans tell Ohio State fans where to go or steal an innocent Nebraska fan's family heirloom hat and offer up a ransom note, not to mention a student section sporting t-shirts like "F*ck Miami".  At the Arby's outside the stadium we were kindly and genuinely (mean it) told to get home safely.  Friends trying to make their way from the game to the bars in Tuscaloosa were offered rides from strangers, and took them.  One happened to be a past convict passing through, but he was hospitable all the same.

FLIP CUP

Winner: Penn State

After making our way through a bunch of tents in unfamiliar territory (stare downs), our group dressed in navy blue/white sundresses (not anything compared to the sorority gals in heels - DUMB) and sporting game day buttons found ourselves among the UA fraternity folk playing a friendly game of flip cup.  Someone suggested a Bama (boys) vs. PSU (girls) competition not knowing that although they have a top-ranked football program, we all graduated with a degree in drinking games - I mean our mascot got a DUI and is on probation.  We left while on top, passed by our fellow fans and headed to meet friends at a Penn State tailgate.

TAILGATING

Winner: Penn State

I'm not going to even try to paint a picture of what the Penn State tailgate brought.  The few photos here will not do it justice, as I refused to post a pic of Ashley's feet in the ice-filled baby pool filled with beer and who knows what else.  Someone at the airport best referred to the confused and enamoured Alabama fans who made their way over to see what was going as "spectators of a National Geographic special on 'the exotic Penn State tailgaters.'  There were a few complimentary "Wow, you all know how to party" comments passed - and the onsite radio DJ professed on air "Those are the best looking Penn Staters I've seen all day" as we walked by - but really it was more people standing around in utter shock and disbelief at what was transpiring.

 

And the best thing about it - we are alumni.  Five, six, some even more years out.  The only ones with disposable income to make our way down to the game.  You should see our current students or recent graduates at a frat-tastic tailgate. They're an even rarer breed and worthy of a series that would rival 'Shark Week'.

STADIUM
Winner: Penn State/Alabama
It was cute when all the nice Bama fans told us we'd be shocked to see the stadium and all their 100,000 fan seating has to offer.  A short mention that our stadium is bigger made them quiet down.  But to the Tide's credit - they're a lively group of fans whose "Roll Tide" echoes through the stadium as much as a "WE ARE" or quick play of "Zombie Nation".  Penn Staters abandoned their usual chant and replaced it with "sorry for partying" this weekend. I'd much prefer a Beaver Stadium game, but will give credit where credit is due.

oh, and if I wasn't convinced it's the best place on earth to spend four years (and countless hours of college football) ... here's one more:


WELL-ROUNDED PROSPECTS, LIFE SKILLS, CORPORATE CACHE
Winner:  Penn State
Despite our wild performance on the ground of the University of Alabama, we are still a sought after alumni crowd. I got my current job a few years ago without a voice after returning from the 2007 Ohio State game, and a recent Wall Street Journal piece reported (according to 479 recruiters), that public universities are producing "the most prepared and well-rounded prospects for entry-level jobs, with better life skills to fit in to their corporate cultures and prosper."  Penn State topped the list.


While I'm clearly past my entry-level days, let this be a lesson to you all:  tailgating is likely a life skill worth perfecting.  And let this cold and sore throat be a lesson to me:  you're getting too old for this.


-HMOH

HMOH on the left coast

Eight days, 5 airports, 6 flights, 4 states and 8 cities later - and I've returned back to the East Coast for two days ... only to leave for the South and Alabama this evening to witness a meeting of the Penn State Nittany Lions vs. the Alabama Tide (what kind of a mascot is that anyways?).  My Northern charm has been packed, along with my classy tailgating outfit (a first) ... and I expect nothing but Southern grace for my friends and I as we begin our binge drinking and tailgating early on the Saturday morning.  Make that 7 airports, 5 states and 10 cities by Sunday.

Our Sweet Ride

And though it was the result of a cancelled wedding in the Bahamas - the trip to California was amazing!!  I didn't rock the bridesmaid dress as promised, but it didn't stop me from packing 50 lbs worth of outfits (of which I wore about 40%).  I landed in San Fran, but my luggage didn't.  After "calmly" talking with the baggage claim guy, Chris - who now has my cell number and was hoping for an invite out that evening - my stuff was confirmed on the next flight in.  We circled the airport for an hour in our sweet blue Ford Mustang convertible, and grabbed (more like heavy-lifted) my baggage. Chris asked me if I was coming back, I explained "yes, because I need to fly home" and we were on our way.  


Our first night in town we checked out Bourbon and Branch - a supposedly hot spot speakeasy that requires a reservation and 'password'.  The doofus who answered the door looked like the gatekeeper in the Wizard of Oz and let us in to an unpacked, highly unexcitable bar.  After being hit on by the doorman, Nick was served tough whiskey in a teeny cocktail glass and we were quickly over it. 


The coast was scenic and just beautiful.  We leisurely made our way down from San Francisco to Half Moon Bay, the boardwalk in Santa Cruz and Monterey.  In Monterey we went whale watching - awesome for the first two blue whales and that was enough.  My lips were blue by the end of the trip and you could find me hugging the metal pole near the Captain's hut to keep warm.   We then headed past strawberry fields, artichoke farms and wildlife on our way down to San Simeon.  As always, I was attacked by numerous birds and prayed I'd see a whale or sea otter eat one.  I also had a stare down with a weird looking squirrel that was questionably foaming at the mouth. With the top down - then back up because I was cold - then back down again, it'd be safe to say I had little to no good hair days.  


If we wanted to crash weddings there were plenty to be had between Monterey and the 17 mile drive in Carmel by the Sea.  Guest chairs (in white) were positioned in front of hanging trees and on the waterfront. It was here I passed the most heinous wedding dress I've ever seen in my life.  Hot magenta with more toule than an 80s ballroom Barbie had to offer.  In fact, if I had suggested putting this on one my Barbie dolls as a child she likely would have come to life and ripped it off.  


Day 4 we toured Hearst Castle, an awesome reminder that I will never be that rich .. and an equally great reminder that I see people from my High School seriously everywhere I go.  If it wasn't at a phone booth in Amsterdam or climbing an olive grove path in Cinqueterra, Italy ... then it was getting off the bus with me on my tour of William Randolph Hearst's extravagant home in California.


We then made our way back up to San Francisco and stopped along the road to witness "molting" season for the native elephant seals.  Frommers referred to them as "decidedly ugly mammals" - but clearly Frommers has not seen some of the mammals that roam the streets of New York City.  That's decided. We had a great dinner with friends back in the Bay Area and woke up the next morning to bike the Golden Gate Bridge over to Sausalito.  In addition to the people watching, great company and scenic views ... strolling in Sausalito was my favorite part.  I also found myself strangely in the mood for a Pepperidge Farm cookie.


If you plan to head out to the Pacific Coast Highway - I can recommend the following:

• Slanted Door restaurant (Asian fushion, San Fran) - make reservations ahead of time
• Paint Ladies (San Fran) - the Tanners and Uncle Jesse can be found picnicking atop the hill
• Sam's Chowder House (Half Moon Bay) - eat the lobster roll, voted "Top 5 Sandwiches by the Today Show"; sure it was back in 2007 ... whatever.
• Monterey Whale Watching Tours - pack layers and jackets, and if not ... be prepared to buy a sweet windbreaker embroidered with sea otters.
• Hearst Castle Tours (tour 1) - The second most visited place in all of California next to Disneyland - the tour is short, sweet and to the point; reservations recommended for summer busy season.  Also, putting "Citizen Kane" on my movie queue.

So with that ... I'm back on the road to 'Bama and then am looking forward to sticking around NYC, exploring my new neighborhood ... and kicking off the Fall.


Thanks for being patient while I took a vacation as the HMOH.  A big congrats to Amy and Drew on their Pacific Coast wedding this past weekend!  Oh, and one more thing .. LET'S GO STATE!

Painted Ladies - San Francisco

Half Moon Bay

Pacific Coast Highway - Big Sur

-HMOH