SIDENOTE: heard from the hallways

I work with a majority of women so the banter in the hallways is what you would see in the movies, and what would likely make dudes puke.  Today a pow wow outside my office at 9:30 a.m. addressed how some people are wearing boots too soon (people in NYC ... and by people I mean idiots ... have been wearing UGGs since August).  One girl chimed in with "I mean, I saw someone wearing tights today!"  And so it was awkward when I looked down at my skirt with tights ... and short boots ... and felt pretty bad about myself.  


Then there are conversations you overhear from across the way and you have to make that conscious decision if you're allowed to laugh out loud or not.  Like today, newlywed Dena was talking to her husband and helping him to respond to an HR manager for a position he's applied to.  This is what the rest of us heard:

• So I'm supposed to take time out of my work day to do this for you?
• Oh, so you don't know how to attach a file? You have no problem doing it every week for fantasy football.
• Well. If you can't write an email then you should be a janitor.
• You know what Steve, I'll just write it.  I have to go.

And there you have it.  The hallway got entertained for a solid 5 minutes, and Steve got what he wanted.  Reminds me of how my brothers asked a million questions of where dishes went in the kitchen so my mom would show them and then realize she'd just put them all away.


On another note - this week I decided to not drink and to pick up anorexia.  Unfortunately the no eating thing lasted from breakfast until lunch.  I think we can all agree that Summer can take its toll on thighs, midsections and livers. A friend recently got a text from her trainer asking her if she ever planned on coming back. I went for 20 minutes on Sunday before I decided I was going to die.  So with the motivation of my dress being much shorter yesterday than it was last year (no, it didn't shrink in the wash) - coworkers and I have created a 'Biggest Loser Club' at the office.  So even if we're talking 3 lbs here (a la Regina George), this program makes you accountable for your gym habits ... and what you pick up off the table left over from client meetings and brainstorms.  It's going to get nasty.  People have threatened to make pumpkin loaves and cookies and leave them in the kitchen to tempt the competition.  But luckily someone has agreed to send 'thinspirational' thoughts each week - and then we'll accompany them with pics like this: 

For our office showdown, you will receive a gold star each time you go to the gym and the person with the most by end of month will get a mani/pedi on the rest of the folks. The competition starts on the first of the October.  So, yea, Friday.  That should work out really well for anyone who plans to live through a weekend.


The format is similar to one I started with my two roommates a few years ago.  We affectionately called it B.A.Y.E. (or "Best Anorexic Year Ever") on a posterboard in our living room.  We tracked our stars for three weeks and got bored, but the poster remained up for two years. Instead, guests would spend evenings while we pregamed determining what we were getting stars for.  There were certain times I needed to defend why I had the most.


On a related note, I was made to watch this video ["Boys Will Be Girls"] at the Cheesecake Factory after I panicked over the menu.  It's now New York State law to include calorie content on chain restaurant menus - which at Cheesecake means eating your weight in lunch. Thankfully it was my birthday (for real, my actual birthday) and the calories didn't count.


Check it out - you'll laugh, you'll agree (you'll lose interest after 3 minutes) and then you'll have a taste of what my office hallways sound like.





-HMOH